“Presence” Vs “Gifts” – How to Have a Creative Holiday Season

It’s no coincidence that “presence” and “presents” sound so similar. What do you remember most from your childhood vacation? Gifts? Or was it the time spent in the presence of friends and family, doing things together to celebrate the season?

Radio, television, billboards, and yes, even the Internet, will have you believe that Christmas is all about gifts. Your value and success as a parent is determined by the number of packages under the tree on Christmas morning. It seems a bit silly and sad, doesn’t it?

There are many ways to reduce the commercialism of the holidays and get back to what really matters: making memories and spending time together as a family. Here are some ideas for having a less commercial Christmas season.

Plan ahead:

The easiest way to have a holiday season full of memories is to discover what you want. What is important to your family? Do some research and pre-planning and find out the important things. Are you going somewhere for Christmas? Do you have commitments or traditions that you need to plan? Do you have family downtime built into your schedule? What activities and events are happening that your family would like to experience?

Next, host a family brainstorming session and include your whole family—even the little ones can give you feedback! Discuss different options for family activities and be sure to include something for everyone. Create a calendar together and put it in a prominent place. This will allow you to see what’s coming up next and give you a reminder that you have things that are important to your family’s schedule and make it easier to say no to things that don’t fit into your family’s vacation plan.

Embrace commercialism:

There is no escaping the commercialism of parties. I saw my first Christmas colored cereal commercial on TV around 10:40pm on October 31st; that’s one thousand two hundred and ninety-seven hours and twenty minutes before Christmas, or seven hundred and twenty-one hours and twenty minutes before December. Your family would need to go on a complete media fast to avoid overexposure to Christmas commercialism, and while it’s not a bad idea, you can also turn commercialism into a learning tool.

Even very young children can distinguish holiday announcements. It’s never too early to talk about the media and its messages with children.

When you see or hear an ad, review it with your child. What product are they marketing? What words do they use to make it sound really cool? What makes this product or product version different from normal? How much use or fun would you get from a product like this? How much allowance would you have to say to get this product? Would having this product make you happy?

Children may not be aware of many of the marketing messages they are exposed to, but they can still be influenced by these messages. Why not control HOW it influences them instead of leaving it to chance?

Every time your child sees or hears an ad, ask him or her to point to it and keep score. This number will increase terrifyingly fast. She decides to cut commercialism by turning her back. For every ad your child may see and discuss with you, donate 10 cents (or any amount you like) to the charity of your family choice, or save 10 cents to help buy supplies for creative activities. This exercise allows for a lot of education and the opportunity to bond with your children about the very ads that promote consumerism and commercialism.

Advent Activity Time:

Many families have an advent calendar for Christmas. Most of these are commercially made cardboard calendars that contain pretty bad chocolate. It does not have to be this way! You can start an Advent Calendar tradition that will create great memories very easily.

One way to do this is to create advent calendar coupons, one for each child for each day of the month of December. These should include quality time coupons. Some may need to be redeemed that day, or others can be saved and redeemed whenever the child wants. These could be for things like playing a family game together, a day trip to volunteer with a local charity or a visit to a museum or other worthwhile ways to spend the day, an extra bedtime story, a special night “date” with each parent, make a favorite gift together, etc. You can give these coupons each day alone or with a single wrapped candy or piece of chocolate. You can mix up lists of things your child loves or admires with coupons. Every child is unique and it is important to let them know that you see them!

By having a plan and identifying what’s important to your family, you have the opportunity to create many memories and new traditions while giving your children the best gift possible: being in the moment and enjoying the holidays together.

What activities do you plan to do together as a family this season? Please share by leaving a comment below!