Bully Busting 101-Part 6
Bully Busting 101 Part 6- Martial Arts
When a child, teenager, or adult is bullied, they often run to the nearest martial arts school. Too often, martial arts schools are: (1) incompetent; or (2) full of thugs who like to practice on newcomers. Sometimes the school is so tough, like many mixed martial arts (MMA) schools, that the newcomer feels overwhelmed. As a lady’s son once told me: “You will push me beyond my limits!” before running out of the room. (Well, yes, it was my job to do that, but not to the extreme.)
If you’re bullied (or just lost a fight), you need to commit to training, just like exercising, eating, and sleeping. You have to approach martial arts with the same dedication. Former world karate champion Chuck Norris once described in an article to a student that he could only perform six sit-ups and three push-ups. However, the student persisted and eventually earned a black belt.
Now the question is always, “what is the best martial art?” Short answer: all of them if taught correctly. I trained in different styles, but I settled on western kickboxing because I was already fit from the army and distance running. Plus, I just got my ass kicked a few days earlier. I was determined to dish out my own butt kicks, so I trained hard and worked on my strength. Within four months of training I was able to hold my own in the ring and win a confrontation. In seven months, I had my first kick-boxing match (and won by technical knockout (TKO)).
The quickest way to decide on a school’s competition is to look at the students. The instructor may be a great athlete, but unable to pass on his skills to his students. Therefore, he may see many nice people, but very unfit and uncoordinated. If they hang out, talk a lot, and joke around, you may be wasting your time. The same goes for long training sessions with little or no explanation.
Kick-boxing, boxing, wrestling, judo, jujitsu, some forms of karate, and other contact martial arts rely heavily on physical conditioning. Some tae kwon do and karate training is disciplined, but can take longer to learn than contact styles. That’s why I recommend them to younger, fitter people who have the stamina and ability to recover from training to take on the “hard” martial arts. Internal forms of martial arts such as aikido and tai chi are also very demanding, but require less intense physical conditioning.
But this is what people get confused over and over again regarding martial arts. Self-defense expert Marc Mac Young explains that martial arts, wrestling, and self-defense are separate. Unlike martial arts combat, wrestling is never a fair one-on-one event. Often the attacks are not fights, but ambushes. In the army, we trained for ambushes, raids, and reactions to gunfire. (The old charge across an open field against an enemy went out of style in Napoleonic times.) This means that self-defense is power. avoid the attack and I see the problems coming prior to problems begin.
So does this mean that martial arts training is useless?
Hell no. Martial arts training is an amazing way to develop some useful skills to use in a fight or self-protection, along with fitness, health, and self-discipline. Self-discipline allows a person to avoid being hurt by insults or getting involved in an argument or fight. The trained martial artist has the patience and confidence to avoid trouble. They tend to walk upright and unhurried and often project confidence. This makes the bully think twice before attacking someone who seems trusting.
After three months of constant training, the trainee usually becomes physically healthier and fitter. After six months, they are mentally stronger. After a couple of years of training, the martial artist finds that self-discipline carries over to other areas of her life and she is able to handle situations at school, work, and home. The person with self-discipline and determination will be able to ignore the put-downs, insults, and teasing of low-level people.
The trick is to keep training while life, work, school and, yes, some bullying continues. That, my friend, is the hardest part. That’s what keeps you going when family, friends, and institutions (like schools) fail. Chuck Norris called it developing inner strength.