When a man is distant after sex: why this happens and how to change it
When a man is distant after sex, he leaves the woman he is involved with full of questions. He wonders what exactly is going on and what he did wrong. In most cases, if she tries to talk to him about it, he will either act surprised or say that he has no idea what she means. If you are in this position with the man you are interested in, you know it can leave you wondering. You will feel insecure about everything. You wonder if he didn’t have fun when the two of you were making love or if he ever cared about you. It is difficult and if you leave it unaddressed, the distance it is trying to reach is likely something permanent. You don’t want that so you need to understand why you are acting this way first and it is also important to know what you can do to change it.
Understanding what it means when a man is distant after sex is not as complicated as it sounds. Some women automatically assume that it means that you are withdrawing because you are so overwhelmed with emotion. That is not the case at all. Usually if a man starts to back away after the two of you have slept together, it is because he is questioning the moment. If the two of you have just started dating and were already intimate, that may impress you in the moment, but it won’t later. As soon as you’re done, you’ll start to wonder if your willingness to share yourself so openly is something you do on a regular basis.
Men don’t want to feel that the women they are with are promiscuous. They never want to wonder if you’ve slept with other men so early in your relationship with them. If you did it to him, he will assume you did it to other men as well.
Obviously, you can’t go back and undo intimacy. That line has already been crossed. If this man is someone with whom you think you want to establish a relationship, you must get down to work to change the image he has of you.
For starters, it means no more sex until you’ve established a new dynamic with him. You’re going to step back and date the man. Since he has become distant, don’t count on him asking you out again. He may do it, but most likely he does it because he wants privacy and little else. You have to establish the new guidelines for the relationship. Meet him at your date destination instead of having him pick you up. Don’t go home for now. Just stay away from any situation that puts you in a position where he expects you to have sex.
If you can do this for a few weeks and get to know him on a basic level, hasty intimacy will become a thing of the past. Go out of your way to establish a real emotional connection with him, and the fact that you’ve slept with him so soon will no longer seem so unflattering.