Yoga – Teaching with compassion

September 2, 2022 0 Comments

The mind will strive to create in the body exactly what it believes to be true. As self-help author Earl Nightingale says, “You become what you think about.” When she was ten years old, my daughter came home from school one day and said, “My teacher told me again that I’m not good at math. If she keeps telling me that, how can I be good at math?” Apparently, my daughter feels the power of the mind more clearly than her teacher. In Milton’s immortal words, “The mind is its own place, and in itself / It can make a heaven out of hell, a hell out of heaven.”

Years ago, a student of mine suffered from chronic back pain that wouldn’t go away no matter what I did. She even studied with Iyengar for ten years and could not get any relief. After 25 years of pain, she finally decided to go to the doctor. After a series of tests, the doctor told her that she had lung cancer and that it had metastasized to her bones and spread throughout her spine. She had been given two months to live. I tried very hard to convince my student not to submit to the doctor’s death sentence. After all, she had had the same bread for over two decades. Unfortunately, it was too late. She had given up hope by giving all her power to the doctor. Two months to the day of her diagnosis, she was dead. This example highlights how, as teachers, we must use our profound influence wisely and choose each word carefully. Careless words can destroy a life, while thoughtful words create the power to flourish.

This approach is not about hiding the truth. We must tell our students the truth that we see. However, we must avoid an inflexible attitude that says, “This is the truth and I must tell it no matter what the cost!” We must tell the truth in a way that serves the student by always reminding them of its power to bring about positive change. we must balance ahimsa with satya: do not harm truthfully.

The language of transformation is the language of compassion. What transforms our students is not a barrage of fiery words meant to burn their egos, but the flame of love, warmth and care. If we have a student who is stubborn and conceited, we cannot help him by hitting his ego, because the ego, in defense, builds a hard shell around itself and becomes unapproachable. The way to transform the ego is with compassion and warmth, so that the ego sheds its outer shell and allows itself to be available for change.

We probably all know teachers who put their students down because it makes them feel more competent and amplifies their egos. These teachers can be our models of how not to teach. As teachers, we can ask ourselves: “Do I want to look great or do I want to help my students to grow? Do I want to be the star or do I want to create stars? Do I want to impose my pose on the student, or do I want to help my students to enter and discover their own positions? Am I serving my student or my ego? We cannot serve both.

The art of guiding others is knowing how to help them harness the power of their own minds and allow them to overcome their resistance to transformation. Over time, they will tune in to inner guidance instead of being scattered and misled by external references and comparisons. We can help our students use the power of their minds to destroy or build, stall or transform, bury or resurrect, imprison or liberate. Evolution is only possible with freedom.

© Aadil Palkhivala 2008

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